- by foxnews
- 08 May 2026
Over the hump and safely onto the other side of our first full week of May. All eyes are now on the weekend - and, of course, on that cruise ship that's apparently carrying the Bubonic Plague.
The good news? The WHO says not to worry, and if we've learned anything over the years, it's that the WHO can be trusted.
They're all wasted!
Let's roll.
What else? I've got Ted Turner memories from his early days in Atlanta, a wild scene last night in St. Louis, and this Spencer Pratt out in California seems like a winner. I don't know him from Adam, but as someone who has lived in Free Florida for his whole life, I'd like to think I can spot talent when I see it.
This cat has it.
OK, grab you whatever you have handy today - dealer's choice! - and settle in for a Thursday 'Cap!
Which number pandemic is this for you?
Let's spin the wheel and start with the predictable freakout over this rat virus on the cruise ship. No, I ain't looking up the name. I don't much care. Not yet, at least. I choose to ignore it, because that's how I assume things just go away. It's how I live my life, really.
All the hullabaloo did get me thinking about all the fearmongering I've been through over my 33 years on this planet. Obviously, COVID was the big one. Duh. But, folks forget that we've heard it all over the past three decades.
When I was a kid, it was the SARS outbreak. When I was a junior in high school, it was swine flu. Remember swine flu?! What a time to be alive. My then-girlfriend (now-wife) actually got swine flu, and then took the ACT and absolutely embarrassed me. I think she got a 34. I'm quite sure I didn't sniff the 30s.
Of course, there was the Ebola madness when I was in college, and then COVID. People forget about the Monkeypox hysteria after COVID in 2023. That was fun. We've also had a couple of flare-ups of the measles and bird flu.
What's that? Six? This will be my seventh! That's a lot of epidemic/pandemic/plandemic experience in just 30 years. I consider myself a seasoned vet. What about you? I'm sure we've got some real warriors in this class. Some pandemic lifers. Let's hear it!
OK, let's get class started with 49ers DE Nick Bosa's girlfriend, Ella Ailiff, hitting the tennis court to get her NFL WAG offseason started:
We have a lot of angry 'Star Wars' fans in class
Welcome to Florida, Ella! Not sure that outfit is setting you up for the best success on the court, but to each his own. Look good feel good, feel good play good. I get it.
PS: Tennis is still far superior to pickleball. I know we're in this pickleball craze right now, but tennis will come back around.
OK, let's keep the line moving. I've got an analytics meeting this afternoon, which should be a barrel of fun.
Shockingly, you guys did NOT hold back.
From Ryan N:
"The prequel trilogy I thoroughly enjoyed, and think phantom menace gets way too much hate because of jar jar, but the darth maul lightsaber duel at the end makes up for that, especially if you're 9 watching it in theaters.
"But the original question, where did they lose me? It was when they killed off Han Solo so lamely in Force Awakens. But even then, the nostalgia was strong enough to get me to go pay money to see The Last Jedi (one of the worst movies I've ever seen, let alone just a bad Star Wars movie). I was completely done after Luke milked the sea dinosaur thing."
I agree with everything! This is why Ryan is a Nightcaps OG. "Phantom Menace" 100% gets way too much hate. The last 30 minutes of TPM are some of the best in the entire saga. There, I said it.
Last Jedi, meanwhile, lost me when they had Carrie Fisher floating in space. Goodness.
From Gene in the Rock:
"For me, 7-9 were the real clinkers. IMHO the series died in June of 2013 when Lucas stepped aside and Kathleen Kennedy took over at Lucasfilms. Everything since then has been s#it. Return of the Jedi was the peak."
No argument from me. Like TPM, the last 30-45 minutes of Return of the Jedi are elite.
... Unless you ask Rick N:
"Star Wars really lost me with Return of the Jedi. When I was young (they all came out in theaters before I was around to go see them, so tv/video tape were my in-roads), I loved all 3 movies, but once I hit around 20 or so, Return of the Jedi was just silly. Ewoks, the repeat of A New Hope's plot, the we're brother/sister, just not good stuff."
Ted's big idea, Cards fans to the rescue and this Spencer Pratt is going places
I can still remember the entire theater gasp when Darth Maul whipped out the double lightsaber. If I remember correctly, the trailers all kept that from us, so it was stunning. Not one single moment in Disney's awful sequels even comes close to those three minutes.
It could also be because, I don't know, they also involved a heavy dose of Mark Hamill, who has become just the most insufferable person on the planet?
Gee, can't imagine why fans were tired of Mark Hamill towards the end! He's so normal now!
OK, let's rapid-fire this long class into a big Thursday night. Strap in, we're going quick.
This is the effect Ted Turner had on folks. People from both sides of the aisle spent yesterday remembering Turner. Some, for his efforts in the media world.
Could you imagine a team trying to pull off THAT promotion in today's world? Folks would faint.
Next? Let's head out to Busch Stadium and get a pulse check from the fans:
Nowadays, they just whip out their phones, hit record, and let the chips fall where they may. Not here. Good work!
OK, that's it for today. A long class, but a solid one. We're almost to the end of the week, folks. Hang on a bit longer.
And maybe take a look at this Spencer Pratt to kill some time. He's the first sane person out of California I've seen in a long, loooooooooong time.
How many p(l)andemics have you been through? Email me at Zach.Dean@OutKick.com.
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